Break Down Here…

Last night was a hard night for me. No, it wasn’t because the Arizona Cardinals lost. Truth be told, I could care less about that.

It was a hard night because occasionally, for reasons unknown to me, I breakdown. I tend to store up a lot of things, keeping it on the inside. I internalize and even though I will occasionally bring it to God, there are times when I feel helpless and it sucks!

So I decided to take a personal day (or if you watched The Office last night, a “personnel day”) from work and it was such a relief! I got a nice wake-up call from Noah to see if I was going to join the guys for lunch. And since I had recommended to Tim that we go to Chick-Fil-A today, I felt obligated to go. So I dragged myself out of bed and had lunch with the guys, it was great.

I then came home, started my laundry, and picked up a book… A Man After God’s Own Heart by Jim George. After all, it’s on my to-do list for 2009. It was really encouraging and I was actually excited that I was making headway in reading it! I have a ton of books on my bookshelf and if you look at some of them, they have Post-It notes that I use as bookmarks… which means that I tend to start a lot of books and end up putting them down. I hope that the books on my to-do list will actually get read!

I took a small break from my reading to continue doing laundry, take care of a couple things from work, and then I went back and read some of my Bible. Perhaps the best part of that was reading out of Romans 12, which was really encouraging for me. Sometimes I find it hard to pick up my Bible and read it because I’ve spent so much time studying it for school that it’s like having to do homework. I have taken this semester off from school because I really need to recharge myself and my “spiritual batteries.”

Finally, I took some time to pray. This is a hard discipline for me. I am constantly doing what I call, “on-the-go” praying… lifting up prayers throughout the day as things come to mind. And that’s great, but I also need to take time to slow down, get down on my knees and pray. Yes, I was raised Catholic and it’s not truly prayer until your knees hurt! Ha ha!

So now I’m sitting here writing this blog post, getting ready to head to the gym with Chad… which should pretty much make my day complete. It was very productive and re-energizing.

All in all, I’m glad I had a breakdown last night. For me, I need to be reminded of my sorrows and to deal with the baggage that I carry. Fortunately, these “breakdowns” have been happening less and less as I find more productive ways of dealing with things. I am constantly reminded of God’s faithfulness in my life and how He has provided for me and sustained me, which is always a great encouragement.

Yup… today was a good day.