Do you ever have moments when you feel like time stops for a while and you just don’t have a care in the world? Maybe that comes when you’re on vacation or on a lazy Saturday afternoon. One of those moments came for me today as I photographed St. John the Baptist Catholic Church in Tipton, Indiana.

I took a couple days off from work and woke up this morning needing something to look forward to. Sure, I appreciate sleeping in just as much as the next guy, but I really wanted something to do. I had talked to my Grandma the night before and as we were talking about my Uncle Leroy, I realized that I hadn’t seen him since Christmas. Well, that was that… I decided to drive up to Tipton today to see my uncle. My uncle is the priest of St. John the Baptist Catholic Church and has been for more than seven years (if not more). I had a good time catching up with him, seeing the remodeling being done on the rectory, and meeting his new dog, Mack.

It’s not everyday that I’m up in Tipton visiting my uncle and usually when I do, it’s to attend Mass. Every time I’ve visited his church, I’m amazed by its beauty: from the stone exterior, to the marble floors, wooden pews, pipe organ, and the stained glass windows.

As I finished up visiting with Uncle Leroy and his sidekick Mack, I decided it was time to head over to the church. It was so nice and refreshing to walk into the church with nobody there and to have the sound of silence. One of the first things I wanted to photograph was the pipe organ. It was built in 1906 by the Marshall-Bennett Company out of Moline, Illinois. For those of you who are organ aficionados, it is an Opus 181, has two manuals, pneumatic chests, tubular pneumatic key action, and pneumatic stop action. It really is a beautiful organ.

The organ is at the rear of the church in a loft overlooking the rest of the sanctuary. When playing, the organist has his/her back to the altar and has a mirror above so that he/she can look down at the church and see what’s going on.

After photographing the organ, I walked downstairs and stopped to take a look at the picture of Our Lady of Perpetual Help. For those of you non-Catholics, Our Lady of Perpetual Help is another name for the Virgin Mary. Catholics will often pray to Mary and ask her to intercede on their behalf with Christ. In front of the picture of the Blessed Virgin is a notebook where many have written short, one-line prayers.

As I finished photographing the church, I looked out at the empty wooden pews and thought about all the prayers that have been lifted up to heaven from this place. I also looked around at the beauty of the church and realized how much of a refuge this place is for the people who worship here.

Hopefully they will have a moment like I experienced, a moment where time seemed to stand still and there wasn’t a care in the world.

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Sometimes in our lives we need to be reminded of where we’ve been so that we can hopefully be able to rejoice in how far we’ve come. For me, this moment came on Saturday as I spent some time photographing St. Luke Catholic Church.

For those of you who don’t know, I went to St. Luke Catholic School from fourth through seventh grade. It was a slightly difficult transition for me because I was a non-Catholic in a Catholic school. I made a great first impression during communion when Mrs. Sullivan held up the wafer and said, "the body of Christ" to which I responded, "thank you" and gladly walked off. Fortunately, Mrs. Sullivan tracked down my teacher after Mass and made sure I didn’t take communion until I’d gone through the classes and had my official first communion.

As time progressed I grew in my faith at St. Luke’s. The religious education director of the church, Mrs. Spitznogle, took the time to talk with me about first communion. When I was ready, I went to my uncle’s parish where he was the priest and had my first communion.

Over the next few years I spent countless hours at the church: children’s choir practice on Tuesday afternoons, Mass at least once a week for school, singing in the choir for Mass on Saturday’s at 5:30 p.m. Not to mention holy days, the Rosary, confession.

I tell you all of this to show you what my spiritual life consisted of at St. Luke’s. If you had asked me back then what I was, I would’ve identified myself as Catholic. If you would’ve asked me about my relationship with God, I would’ve acknowledged that I prayed to him regularly and had a great reverence and was in awe of His holiness.

To this day, I will still go to a Catholic church to pray when I really need alone time with God. There is something about the beauty, sacredness, and holiness of the Catholic church that draws me in.

As I wrapped up photographing the church on Saturday, I took some time to kneel on those all-too-familiar kneeling benches to say a prayer. Then, I just sat there and looked up at the mosaic of Jesus on the cross.

My spiritual journey started at St. Luke’s, but it didn’t end there. As I stared up at that mosaic, I thought about how thirteen years had passed since I last knelt and prayed to God at St. Luke’s. I thought about my parents’ divorce, struggling through years of anxiety disorder, my mom remarrying, two of my brothers getting married, graduating high school, finishing college, making friends, remembering friends who had passed away, the blessings that I’ve had in my life, and the darker times I’ve gone through.

As I sat and stared at that mosaic of Jesus, I wanted to weep. Because during many of those years, I fell away from Him. But I can rejoice because Jesus has brought me back into a personal relationship with Him and I have grown so much in my faith because of it. Spending some time at St. Luke’s on Saturday was definitely a blessing reminding me of where I’ve been and how far I’ve come.

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." – Deuteronomy 31:6

"Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." – Lamentations 3:22-23

I’ve started taking my little Bible to church with me again. Part of me thinks that some people may see me using my Bible on the iPhone and think that I’m doing something else (like checking Facebook or sending text messages). So I take my little Bible with me and today I opened up my Bible and found this prayer card from my grandfather’s memorial service. On the front is an image of the “Sacred Heart of Jesus” and on the back has the Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi, it goes like this:

Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

That’s pretty awesome if you ask me. I’m glad I stumbled across this prayer card. It’s message is a constant reminder to me. I’m also happy to see that Sarah McLaughlin sung this prayer in a song, enjoy!

When I first started going to church, you couldn’t keep me away. I would even sit up front, right next to the pastor. I was so interested in it that I felt called to go into ministry, so I started going to Bible college.

After I broke up with my girlfriend over a year and a half ago, I stopped going to church all the time. I was working at the church five days a week, going to school part-time, and attending my college group on Thursday nights. I had convinced myself that my college group on Thursday nights was “good enough,” but I soon realized I was going there primarily for the friendships and the teaching was secondary (sorry David!).

I was burnt out. I was tired of school and that hatred towards school rolled over into my spiritual life… and it’s extremely sad. After all, shouldn’t going to a Bible college be spiritually fulfilling? Well, I believe it should and I know that it’s not completely the school’s fault. Most of the blame lies with me.

So what have I done to reverse this trend? For one thing, I took a leave of absence from school. I could lie and tell you that this was a hard decision to make, but it was actually one of the easiest. I knew that if I didn’t take time off to take care of myself, that I would sink further into cynicism and farther away from God. In fact, even though I was in a spiritual “funk,” I still spent lots of time on my knees praying to God, crying out to God, searching for direction.

I don’t intend for this time-off to be “lazy time.” I am trying some new things to occupy my time: I’ll be participating in the Carmel Citizen’s Police Academy on Mondays, volunteering at Shepherd Community on Tuesdays, going to college group on Thursdays. I’ll also be reading the Bible and other books, writing, photographing, and traveling more.

Perhaps one of the greatest things that has helped me is attending weekend services. Fortunately, I have found a group of friends who are more than willing to go on Saturday nights with me! I even won Chad over as a Saturday convert when Grace bumped up the Sunday service time from 10:45 a.m. to 11:00 a.m. Apparently fifteen minutes is a big enough gap of time for Chad to swear off going on Sunday and to start attending on Saturday.

The past five weeks have been amazing for me, mostly because of the worship. There were times when I would read the lyrics on the screen and would choke up, unable to sing because the words spoke to me in that moment. This week, it was Hillsong United’s “Mighty to Save.”

As I’ve wrestled with God over this past year, one thing still remains the same, our God is mighty to save. And I thank Him everyday for his unconditional love, patience, mercy, and grace.

I know God is working in me and I’m so thankful that I’m getting out of this spiritual “funk” I’ve been in for the past year. Thank you Lord, thank you for being so faithful!

As I finish this post, I just want to leave with you a video of the song “Mighty to Save” and I hope that it serves as an encouragement to all of you.

“And I am certain that God,who began the good work within you,

will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”

- Philippians 1:6

One of the toughest parts of the job, as any officer will tell you, is doing death notifications. To have someone arrive at your doorstep and tell you that your loved one is dead is a bit of news that nobody wants to hear. The care that the chaplain extends to that family differs depending on the chaplain. Some might make the notification and leave. Others may stay and calm the family while calling a family friend or pastor to take care of them.

My hope is that I can be a chaplain who helps restore shalom. One definition for shalom is, “peace. Nothing missing, nothing broken, wellbeing, and complete.” For a family whose life has been torn apart by tragedy, I would hope that I can do what I can to help them get the resources they need to deal with the grief they are experiencing. And to an extent, that trajedy will always be a part of them… shaping who they are. The difference has to be the resources available to help put that person in a direction that will bring them to restoration.

If I were to have a mission statement for my chaplaincy, it would be this quote by Jonathan Edwards:

“The strength of a good soldier of Jesus Christ appears in nothing more than in steadfastly maintaining the holy calm, meekness, sweetness and benevolence of his mind, amidst all the storms, injuries, strange behavior and surprising acts and events of this evil and unreasonable world.”

Or to look at scripture it says this, “the people living in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned.” (Matthew 4:16)

In essence, hopefully I can be a light in their darkest hour or I can surround them with people who will help them through the trouble times.

One of my favorite music videos is by Simple Plan. The song is “Untitled” and as you watch it, you will see the depth and emotion that goes on when a family experiences something tragic. Their world is shaken dramatically. So as you watch this video, remember that amidst all that darkness, chaplains can be a light.

Untitled
Simple Plan

I open my eyes
I try to see but I’m blinded by the white light
I can’t remember how
I can’t remember why
I’m lyin’ here tonight
And I can’t stand the pain
And I can’t make it go away
No I can’t stand the pain

Chorus:
How could this happen to me?
I’ve made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
as I’m fadin’ away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

Everybody’s screamin’
I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I’m slippin’ off the edge
I’m hangin’ by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can’t explain what happened
And I can’t erase the things that I’ve done
No I can’t

How could this happen to me?
I’ve made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
As I’m fadin’ away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

I’ve made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
as I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

At first I thought it was going to be interpretive dance, but it actually turned into a very meaningful video for me that illustrates how we often get separated (in some ways) from God through our own selfish actions and the actions of others. For me, I could see both sides of the coin. It was incredible how much she tried to be free from the things that was keeping her weighted down. I also realized as I watched it that perhaps we can sometimes get in the way of people connecting with Jesus.

It’s a powerful song and a powerful video. I hope you enjoy it.

Everything
Lifehouse

Find Me Here
Speak To Me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That’s leading me
To the place where I find peace again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose…you’re everything.

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won’t let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Cause you’re all I want, You’re all I need
You’re everything,everything
You’re all I want your all I need
You’re everything, everything.
You’re all I want you’re all I need.
You’re everything, everything
You’re all I want you’re all I need, you’re everything, everything.

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

It’s called a prie-dieu, which in French means, “pray [to] God.” For those of you who don’t know, I spent many years at a Catholic school and it was not uncommon for me to go to Mass (service) two times a week, which included using a prie-dieu to kneel and pray.

Well my uncle is a Catholic priest and was very gracious and gave me this prie-dieu which survived a fire in the church many years ago. My hope is that by placing it at the end of my bed, that it will serve as a reminder to spend a little time with God before I go to sleep.

To me, it’s almost like I’m “checking in” with God. Almost to say, “hey God, here are my praises, my concerns, etc.”

Do any of you have any special ways of approaching God in prayer? How do you spend time with Him? I know my way may seem odd to some, but I find it very relaxing and an appropriate posture for prayer.