I’ve started taking my little Bible to church with me again. Part of me thinks that some people may see me using my Bible on the iPhone and think that I’m doing something else (like checking Facebook or sending text messages). So I take my little Bible with me and today I opened up my Bible and found this prayer card from my grandfather’s memorial service. On the front is an image of the “Sacred Heart of Jesus” and on the back has the Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi, it goes like this:

Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

That’s pretty awesome if you ask me. I’m glad I stumbled across this prayer card. It’s message is a constant reminder to me. I’m also happy to see that Sarah McLaughlin sung this prayer in a song, enjoy!

When I first started going to church, you couldn’t keep me away. I would even sit up front, right next to the pastor. I was so interested in it that I felt called to go into ministry, so I started going to Bible college.

After I broke up with my girlfriend over a year and a half ago, I stopped going to church all the time. I was working at the church five days a week, going to school part-time, and attending my college group on Thursday nights. I had convinced myself that my college group on Thursday nights was “good enough,” but I soon realized I was going there primarily for the friendships and the teaching was secondary (sorry David!).

I was burnt out. I was tired of school and that hatred towards school rolled over into my spiritual life… and it’s extremely sad. After all, shouldn’t going to a Bible college be spiritually fulfilling? Well, I believe it should and I know that it’s not completely the school’s fault. Most of the blame lies with me.

So what have I done to reverse this trend? For one thing, I took a leave of absence from school. I could lie and tell you that this was a hard decision to make, but it was actually one of the easiest. I knew that if I didn’t take time off to take care of myself, that I would sink further into cynicism and farther away from God. In fact, even though I was in a spiritual “funk,” I still spent lots of time on my knees praying to God, crying out to God, searching for direction.

I don’t intend for this time-off to be “lazy time.” I am trying some new things to occupy my time: I’ll be participating in the Carmel Citizen’s Police Academy on Mondays, volunteering at Shepherd Community on Tuesdays, going to college group on Thursdays. I’ll also be reading the Bible and other books, writing, photographing, and traveling more.

Perhaps one of the greatest things that has helped me is attending weekend services. Fortunately, I have found a group of friends who are more than willing to go on Saturday nights with me! I even won Chad over as a Saturday convert when Grace bumped up the Sunday service time from 10:45 a.m. to 11:00 a.m. Apparently fifteen minutes is a big enough gap of time for Chad to swear off going on Sunday and to start attending on Saturday.

The past five weeks have been amazing for me, mostly because of the worship. There were times when I would read the lyrics on the screen and would choke up, unable to sing because the words spoke to me in that moment. This week, it was Hillsong United’s “Mighty to Save.”

As I’ve wrestled with God over this past year, one thing still remains the same, our God is mighty to save. And I thank Him everyday for his unconditional love, patience, mercy, and grace.

I know God is working in me and I’m so thankful that I’m getting out of this spiritual “funk” I’ve been in for the past year. Thank you Lord, thank you for being so faithful!

As I finish this post, I just want to leave with you a video of the song “Mighty to Save” and I hope that it serves as an encouragement to all of you.

“And I am certain that God,who began the good work within you,

will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”

- Philippians 1:6

One of the toughest parts of the job, as any officer will tell you, is doing death notifications. To have someone arrive at your doorstep and tell you that your loved one is dead is a bit of news that nobody wants to hear. The care that the chaplain extends to that family differs depending on the chaplain. Some might make the notification and leave. Others may stay and calm the family while calling a family friend or pastor to take care of them.

My hope is that I can be a chaplain who helps restore shalom. One definition for shalom is, “peace. Nothing missing, nothing broken, wellbeing, and complete.” For a family whose life has been torn apart by tragedy, I would hope that I can do what I can to help them get the resources they need to deal with the grief they are experiencing. And to an extent, that trajedy will always be a part of them… shaping who they are. The difference has to be the resources available to help put that person in a direction that will bring them to restoration.

If I were to have a mission statement for my chaplaincy, it would be this quote by Jonathan Edwards:

“The strength of a good soldier of Jesus Christ appears in nothing more than in steadfastly maintaining the holy calm, meekness, sweetness and benevolence of his mind, amidst all the storms, injuries, strange behavior and surprising acts and events of this evil and unreasonable world.”

Or to look at scripture it says this, “the people living in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned.” (Matthew 4:16)

In essence, hopefully I can be a light in their darkest hour or I can surround them with people who will help them through the trouble times.

One of my favorite music videos is by Simple Plan. The song is “Untitled” and as you watch it, you will see the depth and emotion that goes on when a family experiences something tragic. Their world is shaken dramatically. So as you watch this video, remember that amidst all that darkness, chaplains can be a light.

Untitled
Simple Plan

I open my eyes
I try to see but I’m blinded by the white light
I can’t remember how
I can’t remember why
I’m lyin’ here tonight
And I can’t stand the pain
And I can’t make it go away
No I can’t stand the pain

Chorus:
How could this happen to me?
I’ve made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
as I’m fadin’ away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

Everybody’s screamin’
I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I’m slippin’ off the edge
I’m hangin’ by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can’t explain what happened
And I can’t erase the things that I’ve done
No I can’t

How could this happen to me?
I’ve made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
As I’m fadin’ away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

I’ve made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
as I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

At first I thought it was going to be interpretive dance, but it actually turned into a very meaningful video for me that illustrates how we often get separated (in some ways) from God through our own selfish actions and the actions of others. For me, I could see both sides of the coin. It was incredible how much she tried to be free from the things that was keeping her weighted down. I also realized as I watched it that perhaps we can sometimes get in the way of people connecting with Jesus.

It’s a powerful song and a powerful video. I hope you enjoy it.

Everything
Lifehouse

Find Me Here
Speak To Me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That’s leading me
To the place where I find peace again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose…you’re everything.

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won’t let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Cause you’re all I want, You’re all I need
You’re everything,everything
You’re all I want your all I need
You’re everything, everything.
You’re all I want you’re all I need.
You’re everything, everything
You’re all I want you’re all I need, you’re everything, everything.

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

It’s called a prie-dieu, which in French means, “pray [to] God.” For those of you who don’t know, I spent many years at a Catholic school and it was not uncommon for me to go to Mass (service) two times a week, which included using a prie-dieu to kneel and pray.

Well my uncle is a Catholic priest and was very gracious and gave me this prie-dieu which survived a fire in the church many years ago. My hope is that by placing it at the end of my bed, that it will serve as a reminder to spend a little time with God before I go to sleep.

To me, it’s almost like I’m “checking in” with God. Almost to say, “hey God, here are my praises, my concerns, etc.”

Do any of you have any special ways of approaching God in prayer? How do you spend time with Him? I know my way may seem odd to some, but I find it very relaxing and an appropriate posture for prayer.

It’s in times like these that I like to take walks. I’ve lived in this apartment complex for a few months now and I’m very lucky to be right next to the park. And I love it… take a look at this scene….

Standing on the dock on this pond gives me such great peace and serenity… it gives me time to think about how complicated we humans make things. Matthew 6:25-27 is a great verse for me:

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?”

I actually love my walks in the park because there is a lady who goes around the pond in the evening with her dog and just tosses bits of bread all around the trail for the birds. It’s a beautiful thing.

Once I was done with my walk around the park, there was still daylight, so I decided to grab my basketball and shoot the basketball around. And I don’t know it’s like for some of you guys, but shooting a basketball around by myself is one of the more relaxing things I do. It gives me quiet time… and I often process through things as I shoot the ball around (which is probably why my shots aren’t that great when I’m deep in thought). It also reminds me of a simpler time when I was younger and would take my basketball next door and just shoot around until the sun went down.

I guess my whole reason for this post is to remind myself to slow down, take it easy, not let things bother me so much. I am so thankful for that quiet time that I had today. And if you haven’t had your quiet time today, here’s a 60 second video I took of my view from the dock… take in the sounds… it’s pretty relaxing.

For today’s post, I will be posting a few videos about Scientology. To read more about Scientology, you can go to http://www.apologeticsindex.org/s04.html. These posts relating to apologetics are not meant to attack other faiths, but to promote the spread of knowledge on this topic. Feel free to leave your comments after watching the videos. Today’s post on Scientology is the first round of many.

Scientology: Inside the Cult

BBC Panorama: Scientology and Me

Scientology: The Shrinking World of L. Ron Hubbard